“I wrote this book because I believe befriending is one of the most quietly radical things we can do,” he says “My premise at the core is that we have forgotten how(to befriend) and are lost being in relationships we disagree with. Clearly, our culture is struggling with loneliness and deep divisions.”

The epidemic of loneliness and isolation is an urgent public health crisis, with approximately half of U.S. adults experiencing measurable loneliness. Limited social connections carry serious health risks ranging from an increased risk of cardiovascular diseases to dementia. Young adults have been disproportionately affected.

“The book is for everybody. It is a challenge to talk to everyone,” says Parfait. “We can all use ideas and direction to practice talking to others, especially when we have divergent points of view.”

Parfait Bassalé Has Life Lessons for Learning to Belong

Growing up in West Africa, Parfait’s father’s work included moving frequently with time in Benin Republic, Niger and Senegal. Like being in a military family, the moves meant new schools, new environments, and having to find ways of belonging. Parfait’s later immigration to the United States brought new challenges in finding connections.  He has learned to build bridges through music. “Music is where I went to. It is part of who I am and how I show up,” says Bassalé. You could call him a crossover artist with sounds from pop, reggae, neo-soul, French conscious hip hop and gospel.

After coming to the Olympia area, where his wife Karima grew up, Parfait worked as the Executive Diversity Officer at South Puget Sound Community College. He later transitioned to his own business providing leadership and strategic consulting, keynote speaking, educational workshops and inspiration music storytelling. When working with businesses or non-profits, Parfait supports teams to become stronger with more meaningful relationships and results. “Understanding can be transformative, which is not necessarily agreeing,” he notes.

Parfait Serves on the Board of OlyFed

For decades, OlyFed, a local mutual bank, has been dedicated to building an organizational culture that makes caring for people its highest priority. To that end, it worked with Parfait to enhance how the team takes care of one another by focusing on the health and well-being of its relationships. Parfait’s work was transformational, which led the bank to invite him to join its board of directors.

“We’re fortunate to have worked with Parfait for many years now, and he has played an important role in enhancing our organizational culture and ensuring we live out our values through service to our customers, employees and community,” Ryan Betz, OlyFed EVP/Chief Strategy & Marketing Officer, says.

“Parfait’s new book is an inspiring guide and resource to building connections and making sure everyone belongs through authentic relationships.”

“As a board of directors member, he helps bring together the art, science and heart of community banking to strengthen our mission of advancing the well-being of our neighbors,” Betz says. “Parfait is a bright, intelligent and thoughtful person.”

Consider Starting a Befriending Circle

Parfait shares that you don’t have to be a part of an organization to benefit from his book and his work. He suggests that you and a small group of friends can gather to read “The Way of Befriending” and begin practicing bridge building together. The Befriending Circle creates an atmosphere to reflect, connect and witness each other do the work of transforming communities with the practical tools Parfait outlines in his book.

When you register your group, you will receive a complimentary guide to encourage your leadership confidence. Your group will be entered for a chance to win a visit from Parfait, either in person or virtually. Parfait will share stories and music to deepen your conversations about befriending.

Get Your Copy of ‘The Way of Befriending’

Befriending begins in small ways. Befriending is a journey that calls for courage, curiosity, and compassion. The book integrates stories, songs and tools that readers access via a QR code for a more immersive experience. A full audio version narrated by Bassalé is also available. Practice your listening skills. Parfait’s book and expert support will help create worthwhile results like stronger teams, higher engagement, lasting organizational impact and relationships built on trust, collaboration and belonging.

As Parfait shares in his book, “systems change when hearts change and hearts change when we dare to befriend.” This book is truly an invitation to see the humanity in others and to lead with empathy. You can order a copy of Parfait’s book and find events on his website, Browsers Bookshop, Barnes & Noble or Amazon.